Long Distance lOVe



Is Distance A Deal Breaker In A Relationship?
Can You Successfully Date Someone Far Away?
OK, lets start off on a level playing field shall we? Everybody is different. Everyone's circumstances are different, and so on. Everything is relative. So the real question is, If you happen to find someone special and they happen to be in the next town, or even half way around the world - should you automatically think that a long distance dating and relationship won't work?

Wow. Talk about a can of worms! Ask that question, and you'll have to definitely sift through the good advice and the biased advice. Biased, as in, friends that tell you that it's not a good idea because it never worked for them. Okay fair enough, so that was them - but what about you and that special someone you're thinking about?

Any relationship should be special and meaningful for both the partners, whether it is long-distance or not. In order for this long distance dating relationship to work, both people involved need to know themselves in and out, and know what they want in a relationship.

Key Point: If there is complete honesty and trust between two individuals, it does not make a difference whether they are together or separated from each other.

Now it will likely be overwhelming at times when partners are faced with imagined insecurities about their relationship because they are not spending their daily lives together. Being separated from your love interest can leave all kinds of doors open for an over-active imagination, and it will take patience on the part of both to reassure each other periodically. This is completely normal.

Long distance relationships can actually enhance maturity, bonding and growth. You learn to be honest to each other and show respect and trust for each other. Since there is no day-to-day interaction, each one's thoughts are not communicated to each other for which there is no discussion and reflection. The most important thing about long-distance relationships is to listen to each other,...really listen. You must have implicit trust in your partner, and this can only be facilitated if there is total honesty in the partnership.

Each partner should voluntarily offer information and show empathy. Each one in the relationship should feel secure and be prompted to open up. Honest outright communication is the life and death of a successful relationship, regardless of the distance. Imagine trying to have a meaningful relationship with someone that refuses to be open,...how could you trust that person really?

Good communication and trust is possible, and is demonstrated when each one communicates what they are feeling and reflecting about the relationship. For this you need to communicate with each other frequently, and this is the core.

Use email. Text on your mobile phone. Use your computer's instant messaging capability with a web cam. With today's technology, you can actually feel like the person is right next to you! Now remember to ask your partner when and how much you both need to hear from each other. Don't be afraid to communicate your needs, and don't be too judgmental when hearing the communication needs of your significant other. If you have a concern, simply be open about it.

Day to day life without the one you love with you is hard to say the least. Just this one-time talk can be a stabilizing force to a relationship. When the partners are living away from each other, this force has to be established in different ways like whats mentioned above. Just pick up the phone and talk to your partner at least once a day, even if it is for a few minutes. This enables you to share details and updates about each others lives. Also, if you check in with each other, you can definitely look forward to something special during the day. And you can always make plans and discuss your next reunion.

Make your questions emotionally intimate and this will automatically strengthen the bond between each other, just showing how much you mean to each other. Talk openly about the relationship itself by asking questions about it, like how you are feeling about each other. Openly communicate whether any of you harbor any concerns or worries about the relationship.

As mentioned earlier, you don't have to restrict yourself to phoning in this day and age. Technology is a boon to long-distance relationships. Of course cell phones offer 'free night and weekends' plans, and on the whole telephoning has become cheaper and more convenient. You can even talk long distance in or even out of the country for free with SKYPE, or MSN.

Making use of a different technology like email or text message could definitely come as a surprise and add a bit of spice to your long-distance relationship. Internet free greeting cards or letters via "snail mail" are romantic and also a keepsake memento for times when you are both lonely and missing each other. It's nice to know when someone has tiaken the time to actually "write" something.

There are often misunderstandings, misinterpretations and hard feelings between the partners living apart from each other. This is why it is essential to maintain a sense of humor with your partner. Understanding the partner and knowing each other well should nurture a healthy relationship. In the bargain you get to know, understand and accept your partner with the strengths and weaknesses as well as positive and negative qualities.